The Simplest Way is Giving Away
Help Yourself
Today I said farewell to more stuff. I was wearing out my welcome at the thrift shops and charities, and dreaded the massive undertaking of a garage sale with the added unpleasantness of a weekend forecast calling for chilly rainy weather. But today the weather was nice and my husband said, “let’s just set it at the curb and I’ll bet that most of it will be gone by the end of the day.” He was right. In the space of five hours a ton of stuff was picked through and picked up with the minimum amount of effort on our part. The relief was worth more than the money we were likely to get by trying to have a sale.
I recently posted about getting down to the last few boxes, which was about old paperwork, files, and mementos. The past two or three days, however, was the time for me to decide what to do with old artwork that I didn’t really like or want, the stacks of landscape designs and other stuff from previous careers, and the extra bits of furniture, file cabinets, storage pieces, lamps, decorative items, tools, boxes of nails and screws, household cleaners, paint, brushes, and extra sets of glassware and display pieces from our previous home and our gallery.
Don’t get me wrong–I still really liked and even loved a lot of the stuff. But it wasn’t getting used, nor was it going to be used in our smaller home and quieter life. Instead it hung around the basement gathering dust and getting in the way. There were also many things I hadn’t really used in twenty years or longer. That meant I’d lived through changes of marital status, occupation, health, social life, and just plain aging, and had still carted this stuff around as if my future was going to be the same as my past.
It is not difficult to toss out things you no longer want. It’s a little more difficult to toss out things you think you ought to want and keep. It’s a lot more difficult to face the irrelevance of the things you’ve acquired.
Stuff becomes irrelevant when it no longer serves its purpose. I’ve almost always been self-employed and over the years have acquired (and got rid of) tons of stuff I needed to make my work easier, whatever it was at the time. When I was a landscape designer and contractor, I not only had all the tools and reference works for drawing up plans and blueprints, but the tools for planting, hauling, trimming, edging, building decks and arbors, and laying brick and stone paths. Later, as a gallery owner, I had spotlights, extension cords, bulbs, display cases, shelves, hanging tools, serving pieces for opening receptions, and huge amounts of heavy printing paper and paperwork for artist information and sales. As a cook and caterer I had multiples of bakeware, serving pieces, and storage containers, plus the appliances and sanitation equipment. And throughout all of this I’ve been an artist, with the attendant canvases and paints, but also boxes and boxes of the miscellaneous trivia I incorporated into assemblages (think scrapbooking but ‘way bulkier). Ninety-nine percent of all of this stuff is now irrelevant. While I got rid of much of it at the time of ending each business, I still hung onto far too much. It’s as if some part of me didn’t want to feel it had all been a waste of time and effort, of emotional and financial investment.
Today, as a writer, I only need my laptop in order to work. I’m still an artist and always will be, so the paints and canvases are still around, but I’ve reduced the trivia items to a single box for the purpose of finishing the final two assemblages in progress.
Once the process of letting go started, I found myself coasting on the momentum with every box and bag brought up and set out. Setting things out at the curb was a little unnerving at first. My husband got the large things out there right away, some old furniture and items we used in our gallery several years ago. People started coming up and taking things, smiling and chatting. And it started feeling great, giving things I liked to people who really liked them, too, and giving them new homes. Instead of feeling like I was giving away my babies, I felt like I was strengthening the relevance of my present life. Stuff that had lost its relevance in my basement regained relevance in new hands.
The weirdest part was when a scrap metal collector came by and just started scooping up everything that had metal in it and throwing it into his truck, whether it was a big old filing cabinet or small metal decorative items that I recalled fondly purchasing at one time. But I got past it when I thought about other things that had been tossed during the uncluttering process. Even things taken to thrift stores do not all make it onto the shelves, some of it just gets thrown away by the shopkeepers. At least this guy was was recycling for a living.
In the meantime neighbors came and got a big party bucket, another neighbor walking home from the bus stop got an air cleaner and a corkscrew, and another neighbor walking her dog got insulated coffee carafes. The theatre across the street picked up some things for stage props, too. It was more gratifying to share the love than it would have been to haggle for nickels and dimes on a cold rainy day. I gotta hand it to my husband, he really truly had the right idea!
I’ve just taken another look at the basement and it’s like a new world down there; you can see from one end to the other, a thousand square feet of clean airy basement. There are at least as many empty boxes as there are boxes full of stuff, and the boxes of stuff are mostly artwork and art supplies, which means they aren’t clutter. All the general household things which remain are directly relevant to this house and the way we live now, and are neatly organized and accessible on a few shelves near the stairs. There are some books left to sort through and donate to the library, which will happen tomorrow. There are five large plastic storage boxes in a far corner, mostly things from my son’s early childhood. We will go through those within the next week or so. And that’s it. I could actually roller-skate in my basement….
But that’s a post for a different day ;D
28 Responses to “The Simplest Way is Giving Away”
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Minimalist Photographer
hi meg,
good for you! and what a great idea. 1000 sq ft basement, wow. you could rollerskate there. our basement is maybe 50 sq ft. but we do have a lot of stuff down there, prob 1/4 of which needs to be set at the curb. thanks for the inspiration.
~janet
ps ~ how are the 33 things going? it isn’t too hard is it?
Hi Janet! Yeah, it’s a big basement, the same size as the house, actually, and unfortunately that’s how we managed to cram in so much stuff from our previous house, which was more than twice as big. I think my rationale was taking with a lot of stuff when we moved and then seeing which things worked with our new life and which didn’t. Lo and behold, darn near everything didn’t work out.
Project 333 is going great–it’s a truly new sensation to have such a limited wardrobe while living at home. Oh, btw if you haven’t already, check out my shoes in the Autumn Picnic post at The Minimalist Cook, which is a post you inspired
Super idea – know what you mean about seeing the things you’ve cared for going to others who will appreciate them. In my neighborhood, all would be gone in a “New York Minute” or a “Nano-Second”, whichever is shorter (and I’m certain New Yorkers would argue the former!)
Daphne DeLaurier recently posted..Film Review Jules and Jim
I was really surprised, Daphne, by just how quickly it all went, especially during the middle of a weekday. I just bet, however, that if I had set up a garage sale, even with ridiculously low prices, I’d still be stuck with all of it and not have a good feeling about it, either. This was so much better!
This is a great post, Meg. The thought that my past is not going to be my future particularly resonated with me. No longer do I need the four bedroom two bath house because the four children are grown and gone. It’s actually kind of fun redefining our life.
Willow recently posted..For My Brother
Willow, all my stuff seemed to illustrate a timeline of my life, and there it was: everything that evolved or changed was quite different than what had gone before. I think we are living lives with more choices and possibilities than our parents did, and yet we hang on to things the way they did, thinking that old stuff would continue to be needed in the same way throughout our lives. It just isn’t like that anymore, though.
Having moved many times in the past decade I now have the ability to give things away with ease. At first I found it difficult and often considered my material things “special”. Now I happily pass things on to new owners and amazingly enough, have always found that things I need, in turn, get passed on to me. It’s funny how it works that way.
Fuji, frequent moving will do wonders for packrat-itis! I have not yet experienced the phenomenon of receiving what I need in the manner that I give things away to others, but perhaps it has come to me in a form I have not yet recognized. Must give that one some more thought….
First, congratulations on your progress, Meg. That’s great!
I focused on giving away and donating things, too, when I downsized. I could have made a little money on my stuff, but for me, it came down to money vs. time. I wanted to get clutter out of my house ASAP more than I wanted to spend my free time trying to sell my stuff, and I felt good about passing on my things to people who could use them.
I had my first garage sale this summer. It was interesting to be a seller instead of a buyer for the first time, but it wasn’t really profitable. We made enough to take my in-laws out to dinner for Mother’s Day, which was good, but I was seriously just happy to have people give me some cash and take my stuff away. Once was enough, though.
Naomi recently posted..Order in the Non-Consumer Advocate’s house
Hi Naomi–that’s great that you at least made enough cash to do something nice. I don’t think a garage sale will be in my future again, either. The last one we did was a couple of years ago and it was exhausting. Now we just don’t have enough to make a sale worthwhile, which is exactly where I wanted to be
It feels good to get rid of the last bunch of items. I haven’t actually done this yet, but I’m imagining it feels divine! Our basement is filled with my husband’s tools and all the detritus no one wants to give away, but isn’t important enough to be upstairs. I’m hoping that when we put down the new floor in there it will force us (him) to go through things.
TheSimplePoppy recently posted..Kindlelizing
The tool-sorting required a certain economic realism: if you own a house but can’t afford to hire someone for every little maintenance job, you need tools. So we kept much of what we had, but thanks to getting rid of so much we didn’t need anymore, the tools how have ample storage space and accessibility. When the new water heater was put in, it needed shimming to sit level on the concrete floor. Since I had just cleaned out and reorganized the tools and household miscellany, I actually knew that we possessed shims and where they were, to boot! That was a nice moment
Hi, Meg…This was a great post. My old art and art supplies are the most challenging thing for me to declutter. I do a lot of collage, so I know what you mean about the “extras” that we accumulate.
One of the most helpful things in your post was your point about how things from our past become irrelevant to our future, even though they may remain useful. I’m at that point now. With our children grown, and our grandchildren becoming teens, there’s a bunch of stuff here that I used to keep for them that I will be able to get rid of now.
I’ve always hated yard sales-would never go to one, and would never have one. They’ve always seemed like too much work for too little return. I like your approach better, and that’s what I do-just give the stuff away, or bring it to the re-use shack at our town recycling center.
I’m really enjoying your blog.
Becky recently posted..Friday Decluttering
Hi Becky–oh, art stuff!!! It makes a mess and it’s hard to keep organized, but it is our love and we must have it, minimalist or not.
It is unclear at this time if there will be grandchildren in my future, but I am operating on the assumption there will be and so far am keeping a large box of make-believe costume bits for preschoolers, things like knights in armor stuff, viking stuff, superhero stuff, and other things given to my son by his grandparents, who lived near one of the most amazing toy stores I’d ever seen, the antithesis of Toys R Us.
So some things are just sacred, aren’t they? Yet even those things may someday become moot and will best be moved on to those who will actually use them.
That is really fantastic, Meg.
I wish I had a place where I could hold something similar as a yard sale but really, I don’t have enough to give away to cover a table.
You said it best for me here: It is not difficult to toss out things you no longer want. It’s a little more difficult to toss out things you think you ought to want and keep. It’s a lot more difficult to face the irrelevance of the things you’ve acquired.
When I wrote those lines I ended up rewriting the whole post because I felt it was the key point of my experience. So glad you liked it
You sound so happy and relieved to have this behind you! We have also put things out by the curb and sometimes I am there when the next owner picks it up. They are so happy that it makes me happy too.
It’s contagious, isn’t it? There’s just something about it that adds to life as opposed to diminishing it. Thanks for commenting, Juhli
Hi Meg, I got here through Twitter. I love your post, and I could especially relate to how you feel about art supplies – I have loads, too, and I’m trying to sort out what I want to keep and what I’m ready to let go.
I also totally agree with you on this: “It is not difficult to toss out things you no longer want. It’s a little more difficult to toss out things you think you ought to want and keep. It’s a lot more difficult to face the irrelevance of the things you’ve acquired.”
It’s good to know that you felt relieved after the clean up. I, too, love that my old stuff is no longer gathering dust in a box, but it’s getting used and given new meaning.
Thanks for sharing!
Cristina recently posted..My favourite gingersnap cookies
Hi Cristina–That’s the downside of having been able to buy so many things over a long period of time. Things don’t get used up by the time we want to do something else, and in the case of art supplies this is a natural progression. Yet it can be fraught with guilt. The act of giving away what we no longer need is a good way to assuage the guilt as well as the glut.
Meg,
I agree with Willow about past vs present. The line “as if my future was going to be the same as my past”, speaks to the essence of why we tend to hold on to certain things long past when we should have gotten rid of them. I have a bunch of things in the attic which I refer to as My Former Life – meaning childhood and my first marriage. (If it tells you anything about how long I’ve been hauling it around, I’ve been with my second husband for 13 years now.) I will have to add that debris to the list of spaces/things to be decluttered.
donna recently posted..New Theme- zBench
Oh Donna, I hear you! I just bet that when you get it out of the attic and out the door, you’ll feel an actual physical relief. The house will feel “lighter,” as well. Good luck!
What a wonderful, generous idea!
Annie recently posted..Granny Hits Car
Thanks, Annie–it was generous both ways, not only to the people who got the stuff, but to me and Steve, to not make more of a burden or chore out of the job than it had to be. It was definitely win-win
Hi Meg,
Thank you for sharing. I’ve been contemplating whether to sell my stuff, then donate, or simply donate. I may raise some cash, but the question is will it really be worth the time and effort? With your idea to simply give away, I won’t just make some people happy, my home will get decluttered in no time and I can be more productive. Thanks again!
Living in New Jersey, I found this site by clicking on a link from Facebook. Glad I did. Amazing topic, and great page. Keep up the Wonderful Work.
Really did love this post.
I’ve been donating lots of things and like to think others are getting a turn at using them now. It’s okay to let go of things.
Thanks much.